On the Sunday morning before the end of Spring Break, my
dad came to pick me up at 12 and take me back to school. We went to Crazy Dog’s where I again got a
new bottle cap for my collection. When I
got back I unpacked my stuff. The next
morning I ate lunch with Connor, Anna, and Amanda after that. Then I worked on my boxes made from Lord of
the Rings cards. Then I e-mailed Ellen
Whitt to tell her that I recognized her name on an e-mail about the girl’s
deaths from her name on the Friend of Autism Pledge and I wanted to wish her my
condolences, telling her I was awake a whole night for which I cried for part
of after I heard about it and know several people who are very dear to me who
knew the girls and that I teared up at the vigil when I heard Jennifer was to
be an aunt. I said that I had the
pleasure of meeting the girls at the THRIVE formal as a former THRIVE student
and how I appreciated what they and their organization did for THRIVE such as
the formal and Zumba, as a former THRIVE student and autistic person, was at
the vigil with a former THRIVE students, a current one who is also the
president of the THRIVE student organization, and two other friends who have
disabilities, how equal access to education is not yet available to people with
disabilities, and I shared a link about the vigil on THRIVE’s Facebook page
saying I thought it deserved to be on their for what the girls and their
organization did with approval from director Joyce Downing. I said that I am pleased she took the time to
consider signing the Friend of Autism Pledge and that she is always welcome at
the group to try and further her work for people such as the THRIVE students,
and if she wishes to get involved to contact Barbara Mayfield asking her to forward
my invitations to her and tell her I told her to ask her, or that any potential
volunteer for the group from ASA in the social work, psychology, special
education nursing, and communication disorder programs are welcome to contact
me to try and get involved, and that I sent her and her sisters my love in this
time and believe to I speak on some level for my group, THRIVE, and the whole
of the autistic and disabled community when I do on some level, and hope her
vacation has been as been enjoyable to the fullest extent possible, whatever,
that may be, in this time. I realized
that I would show her I care about her enough to take the time to write this
e-mail, showed her I was thinking of her and observant of her, what the girls
meant to me, that their and ASA’s work with THRIVE is appreciated, that people
within the THRIVE community to care about ASA’s plight, and shown her how other
people share her and other’s grief, and it felt really good and relieved so
much of the feelings I have had recently. I had also seen Laci share a picture of her and some her sisters laughing, saying they spend half their time on the hall doing that.
I realized
that when Laci posted that post saying that she and her sisters spend half
their time in the Panhellenic talking and laughing, she may have been saying,
indirectly, that she and her sisters are dealing with the deaths of those girls
very well, and I need not worry about them.
I thought of the phrase “love me the way I deserve to be loved,” and
instantly I could see a face very clearly, without even trying. I read through a lot of the reading for
tomorrow in my Early American Literature class, deciding I would get myself the
book The Divine Madman as a reward if
I finished it before class tomorrow.
After that Mardy and I went down to housing and found out I need to fill
out a housing agreement form before I can pick my room. He helped me do it, during which time he
admired the view from my room and thought he’d love living in this room,
instead of the one in North Ellis. Later
I filled out the ticket form for the Down Syndrome Dance. After that I saw that The Autist Dharma had
gotten twenty views in one day in the past week, and I saw on Facebook that Mom
loved a post from the Autism Women’s Network from a parent saying she would
does not wish for a neurotypical version of her child, after which she said,
“Shine a light on that,” which basically referred to Autism Speaks saying,
“Shine a light on autism.” It convinced
me that Mom really does love me and respect me the way I am, respects my ideas
about the autism community. I also
shared a few more links on Facebook, one of which has already gotten three
likes. During dinner I ate with Maria,
Casey, Antwon, Robert, and Adrian. I
also realized that for many the fact that I care and love the autistic
community like I would my country or religion really comforts people. I read all but two of the pages for my Early
American Literature class while I was on the treadmill. When I got back I made some more heart-shaped
pins from straws and at Late Night I turned several more plastic bags into
yarn.
The
next morning I started my meditation without having my mala nearby, so I used
the jar of bottle caps on my desk that I got from Those Were the Days to help
me recite my mantras. I took a good
miksang photo after that of the bottle caps from the jar on my desk which I
used to help me count my mantras. Then
at brunch I made another flower from a straw, saw Caitlin shared one of my
dyslexia links from Horizon’s Facebook page, that Stacy, Stephanie, and
Brittany liked my AD/HD link from their page, and that Horizon was doing an
Horizon Academy (HA) story of the month thing by students, former students,
parents of students, and faculty members, and I decided to share mine,
realizing I could do it really well. I
learned that Aragorn was lived in Rivendell until he was twenty, ten years
after Bilbo went to Rivendell while returning from the quest of Erebor, so I is
quite likely Bilbo met him, and I learned of an on-line movie that depicts the
lives of Aragorn’s ancestors leading up to his childhood called Born of Hope. After that I made several more beads from
straws, and stored and sorted them in several of my Altoids containers, and
made some more flowers and heart-shaped pins.
Then I went down to the Union bookstore and got a calendar and a receipt
book, the former of which I made note of the due dates in my class, and the
latter where I kept track of today’s purchases.
I took some good picture prints of my pins and then made some more
beads. Afterwards I worked on my bags
woven from bags. Then I read a lot of
Tuesday’s reading for my World Archaeology class. I shared several links of Facebook, which got
liked very quickly and invited several friends of mine to like one or two
pages. After that I ordered some
basswood on Amazon for whittling. I got
back and found out an ice cream social was taking place in the Ellis TV Lounge
and decided to do that instead for the treadmill, which gave me some time to
start my snack wrapper collage of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Then I went to the ice cream social and saw
Antwon and met a girl there named Amy.
Afterwards I went to Late Night where I saw that several more people
liked my links on Facebook, and one of them accepted one of my
invitations. I worked on wall pieces
made from toilet paper rolls. I started watching Born of Hope, and then I walked down to use the bathroom, walking past a girl I did not think I knew, saying, “Excuse me,” she said, “Sorry, Ben,” I thought, “That was weird. How does she know my name?”I talked to Ryan after that and learned he knows several Alpha Sigma
Alpha and several Alpha Omicrom Pi girls and The Lords of the Rings and The
Hobbit movies and I told him about Born
of Hope, and we agreed to get together and watch it on Saturday. I also learned that an Alpha Sigma Alpha girl
was interested in him, and while he said that he didn’t want to date anyone
right now to focus on his career, I told him those ideas can always change in
an instant. I sorted some recycling
afterwards and when I left, I realized how great Ryan’s advice to hang in there
for those affected by the girl’s deaths was because if you can last for a
certain amount of time, time will heal these wounds. I realized that Laci probably put a lot of
those Facebook photos of she and her friends enjoying themselves after I posted
on how I was so full of grief after the girl’s deaths because people I love so
much knew them and were affected by it, as a way of easing my grief by letting
me know she was ok. I realized that if my friends like Caitlin
and Stacy, who never went to my high school, which I at least know for sure
with Caitlin as I know she went to Shawnee Mission East, then it seems I’m
becoming quite the advocate for Horizon on Facebook, adding to my credibility
as an autism advocate.
On
Friday night I saw The Hobbit: The
Desolation of Smaug again. On
Saturday morning I During breakfast I realized while standing in line for
pancakes how it must be to work at Suxedo where you stand on your feet all that
time, as I usually regard breakfast time on weekends as my relaxation
time. I also worked on a picture frame
made from chips bags. Then I made
another flower from a straw. After that
I took out my trash and recycling. Later
I read the rest of the reading for my Film Appreciation class. I sat with Mary at dinner later and
afterwards I saw I got my basswood (though wrapped in an inordinate amount of
paper when it wasn’t something like say, fine china), and carved an Indian Om
from it. I worked on my plastic bag yarn
on the treadmill and after I got back I made another coaster from
receipts. Ryan ended up not being unable
to watch the movie Saturday due to school work, so we decided to reschedule
it. I realized Bob could maybe break his
smoking habit by having a pack or two around him, but they are filled with
sweets and such, so he would always have a pack around and wouldn’t feel like
he needs to get more, but at the same time there wouldn’t be any cigarettes for
him to smoke.
On
Sunday I also watched and read all the material for my Modern Sub-Saharan
Africa class this week and was able to do the posting and two responses, which
I felt were very good, though I posted them after 3, which my instructor said
is the deadline for full credit though he’s ignored that rule before. I realized I can be totally engrossed in
talking insightfully, clearly, and with great detail about the world of film
and then move on to doing so about democratization on Africa. I saw a film which talked about a woman
selling bags from Africa in a for profit business, which was deliberate because
she wanted to show that fair trade and business can go hand-in-hand. A filmmaker in that video (who is white by
the way) had one of his hit films shown at the Pan-African Film Festival, and
he said he wanted to show people that successful films can do something like be
accurate or something. On
Monday, I finally finished my article summary for my Early American Literature
class. I also gotten to do some reading on DIY yarn projects, and learned
about making old t-shirts into yarn, which I started with the t-shirts I’ve
collected, and that you can pull on it to twist it. I read all this while I
drank a macchiato and ate a bagel from Einstein’s with the two hundred dollars
Mom agreed to transfer from my Missouri bank account to my U.S. Bank account
today when she got back from Philadelphia, so I would get it today. I saw her
first post for her beekeeping blog, which I told her about how I thought it was
great. I also complimented the author of The Third Glance, who I will mention
in my post on what I plan to do for Autism Acceptance Month, on her post about
how she plans to post more this month. I also got some more Doritos, fruit
slices, and an Snapple (no new cap though) tonight, walking to help clear my
head, and picked up several recyclables on my way back, and throughout the day
I took several more miksang photos and made several more heart-shaped pins from
straws, one of which, a colorful one, I took a picture of with the reflection
of light from a ceiling lamp on a table in the dining hall surrounding it so it
looks like light’s shining from it, and I’ve studied for two fifty minute study
blocks with a ten minute break in between to use the bathroom, and get a drink,
for my World Archaeology test, which I found out is on Thursday and I’ve made
an appointment for in the Testing Center. I also noticed that the Hank Hill
yarn painting I’ve been doing looks an awful lot like me.
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